BEST joke post here reward points per day 5 points for best one judged by votes

[LadyDawn]

think this will be fun one liners or whatever you have post it here i will asks for votes next day and reward 5 points for the one with most votes

if a tie happens points are split

I will start off with one of my old favorites

IF it's racial try to use other words instaed of derogatory ones !

YOU know what i mean the N word and other ones describeing races !


Man gets stranded on small isalnd from plane crash

HE only has his dog with him and some food !
after a week goes bye he comes upon a sheep and he wants to bang that huge pink sheep pussy !

drops pants and starts fooking it ; But DOG gets jealous growling pulling his leg to make him stop so he waits till late night when dog is asleep and tries agin

DOG wakes up and pulls him away

day after day he tries but the pooch wont let him !

SO one day about 100 yards away a boat is anchored he watches with eyes wide to see if he gets noticed !

A woman dives in and all of a sudden is screaming help help i'm drowning !

HE dives in and saves her taking her back to shore !

A true beauty she is; and she is greatful thank you so much you saved my life what can i do for you ?

HE quickly blurts out yes could you take my dog for a long walk ?

[Bozzie]

top this joke










thanks for the points

[HAMILROCK]

When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300°C.

The Russians used a pencil.

[PHILLYBIRDS20]

q what do u call a woman with a set of hairy ones?

a A dude

[LadyDawn]

hamilrock thats funny i never heard that one or maybe forgot i heard it !

ooo BTW my joke i posted to start gets no votes

I can vote for others jokes !

who knows maybe we get a real standup comedian out of this start off a career for someone !

[pwherr]

Originally Posted by Bozzie

top this joke










thanks for the points

You win

[Kramer]

John Elways wife reportedly heard screaming
TEBOW
during sex on the weekend ...

[Big Pimpin]

Originally Posted by PHILLYBIRDS20

q what do u call a woman who posts under the name of Lady Dawm?
a A dude

fixed it for you

[TrailerParkBoys]

There was a White guy, Mexican and a Black guy who hadn't fathered any kids approaching the Pearly Gates.....


a Black guy who hadn't fathered any kids....hahahahahahahaha .....who am I kidding!

BO to the mutha fuking OM!!

[Davydave]

A nun is taking a walk through the woods and comes along the local parish priest, who is naked at the time.

The nun points at his member and asks, "Father what's that?"

"That, my child is a rose, stroke it and it will bloom!" the priest replies.

The nun strokes it, and it blooms.....

Upon returning to the convent, the nun sees the mother superior and reports about the naked priest and the rose and how it bloomed.

Mother superior responds, "That son-of-a-bitch.... he told me it was a trumpet!"

[mrhotpicks2]

didnt read anything in post #1 here, i havent had a headache yet so want it to stay that way ...... but ill give a joke ......

ladydon said he is a chick

[Prolineus Veneficus]

i slipped on some ice yesterday and hit my head pretty hard...when i came to my wallet and shoes were missing....musta been black ice.

[garyrenard]

Man walks into a bar and tells the bartender to set a dozen shots of his finest single-malt whiskey. When the bartender is finished, the guy hammers down all 12 shots in under 30 seconds.

The bartender asks the customer "Why did you do that?", and the customer replies, "If you had what I have, you drink like this too."

"Oh my God", the bartender replies. "What do you have?"

"Fifty cents."

[T100]

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"

Pay me

[Cash Calloway]

^ Winner