This Is A Classic....

[Victor]

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ
so much. And I never have
figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out
why men think with their head
and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't
feel like it, I just want
you to hold me."

I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every husband/boyfriend on the planet dreads to
hear... "You're just not in
touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your
physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for
who I am and not what I do
for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to spend time
with her. We went out to a
nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department
store. I walked around with her
while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She
couldn't decide which one to take
so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I
said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry
department where she picked out a
pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She
must have thought I was one
wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me
because she asked for a tennis
bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw
her for a loop when I
said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction
from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't
feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"

I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
You're just not in touch with
my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping
needs as a woman." And just
when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why
can't you just love me for who
I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch
knows I'm smarter than
her....

[TSZ]

Bahahahahahha nice

[smooth53_98]

Oldie but a goodie!

[g_rock65]

Classic!

[justdonating]

Very nice!