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  #1  
Old 08-17-2010, 08:07 PM
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Man Arrested After Ejaculating Two Times into Female Co-Worker's Water Bottle

Here is a photo of the sap that did this!



SANTA ANA – A man was arrested today on charges of ejaculating twice into a female co-worker’s water bottle on her office desk. Michael Kevin Lallana, 31, Fullerton, is charged with two misdemeanor counts each of releasing an offensive material in a public place and assault, with sentencing allegations for committing a crime for sexual gratification. If convicted, he faces a sentence ranging from a minimum of three months to a maximum of three years in jail with mandatory sex offender registration. The People requested Lallana be held on $10,000 bail. The defendant is out of custody on $500 bond and is scheduled to be arraigned September 14, 2010, at 8:30 a.m. in Department C-46, Central Justice Center, Santa Ana.

In 2005, Lallana is accused of meeting a co-worker, in her twenties, Jane Doe, while working at Northwestern Mutual Mortgage Company in Newport Beach. On Jan. 14, 2010, Lallana is accused of assaulting Jane Doe by entering the victim’s office and depositing his ejaculation into a water bottle that was on her desk. The defendant is accused of leaving the semen-filled water bottle on the victim’s desk which Jane Doe later drank upon returning to her office. The victim, unaware of the bottle’s contents, drank the contaminated water. She threw it away after feeling sickened and irritated.

Approximately three months later, Jane Doe and six other employees, including the defendant, were transferred to the Northwestern Mutual Mortgage Company’s Orange branch. On April 9, 2010, Lallana is accused of assaulting Jane Doe by depositing his ejaculation into a water bottle that the victim left on her desk. The defendant is accused of leaving the contaminated bottle on Jane Doe’s desk and returning to his office. The victim later returned to her office and drank from the semen-filled water bottle. She was sickened and irritated. She sent it to a private lab to be tested.

In June 2010, Jane Doe was contacted by the private lab who confirmed that the water bottle contained semen. The victim reported the incidents to the Orange Police Department (OPD). In early July, following further investigation by the OPD and Orange County Crime Lab, the defendant was linked through DNA to the crimes. Lallana was arrested early this morning outside his Fullerton home by OPD.

Deputy District Attorney Bobby Taghavi is prosecuting this case.
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Old 08-17-2010, 08:16 PM
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protein shake
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  #3  
Old 08-17-2010, 08:17 PM
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agreed be. he shoulda charged her for it
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Old 08-17-2010, 08:48 PM
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Didnt even read the article, just the title. Sounds very interesting and I got a good laugh at this
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Old 08-18-2010, 01:07 AM
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Its funny the lengths people go to these days, I mean what was he thinking? The answer is he probably wasn't, but if he goes to jail, I am sure he will be greeted with alot of smiling faces.
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Old 08-18-2010, 01:59 AM
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i wish i had time to jerk off at work......
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Old 08-18-2010, 02:03 AM
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Hope this is legal in pennsylvania or friday afternoons are phukke for me
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Old 08-18-2010, 04:27 AM
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in phila pa they do it in the courtroom
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  #9  
Old 08-18-2010, 05:08 AM
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thats so sick
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  #10  
Old 08-18-2010, 07:53 AM
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I'm older eyes not what used to be..but is that not gg??
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  #11  
Old 08-18-2010, 07:58 AM
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i just love the fact that he got away with it the first time, but got 'busted' the 2nd time ... am i reading that right?? lol
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  #12  
Old 08-18-2010, 09:11 AM
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I like the use of the term "deposited" - like he's at the bank.

"Hi, I'd like to make a deposit...[splooge]".

"Would you like a receipt, sir?"

"Naw, I'm good...actually can I bum a cigarette?"

"One moment, sir...uh, strangely, I feel sickened and irritated."
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  #13  
Old 08-18-2010, 11:08 AM
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he waz such ah good boi...he waz such ah good nayburr...nevva evva wooda figured ol' mikey boi az ah tally wakkin' spermatoe floater...

into ah fukkin water bottle an' everything...geesch...

o look at him...heez so cute...u think heel b ok...
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Old 08-18-2010, 02:41 PM
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only twice in a water bottle? ****in amateur
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  #15  
Old 08-18-2010, 03:09 PM
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dang i guess people are getting crazier now days lol probably jerked off in the restroom got her bottle and dumped it on her desk lol
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