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  #1  
Old 03-03-2006, 10:11 AM
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Signs, Signs, Everywhere Is Signs...

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
**************************

In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."
**************************

On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon :
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
**************************

On another Septic Tank Truck:
"We're #1 in the #2 business"
**************************

At a Proctologist's door:
"To expedite your visit please back in."
**************************

On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
**************************

On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.."
**************************

On a Church's Billboard:
"7 days without God makes one weak."
**************************

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."
**************************

On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:
"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"
**************************

At a Towing company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
**************************

On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
**************************

In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
**************************

On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."
**************************

At an Optometrist's Office :
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
**************************

On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."
**************************

On a Fence:
"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!"
**************************

At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
**************************

Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary We hear you coming."
**************************

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
**************************

At the Electric Company :
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment.
However, if you don't, you will be."
**************************

In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up."
**************************

In the front yard of a Funeral Home :
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

**************************
At a Propane Filling Station ,
"Thank heaven for little grills."
**************************
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Seth: Gimme that. Alright, you look like a future pedophile in this picture, number 1. Number 2: it doesn't even have a first name, it just says "McLovin"!
Evan: What? One name? ONE NAME!?!? Who are you? Seal?
Seth: Fogell, this ID says that you're 25 years old. Why wouldn't you just put 21, man?
Fogell: Seth, Seth, Seth. Listen up, ass-face: every day, hundreds of kids go into the liquor store with fake IDs, and every single one says they're 21. Pssh, how many 21 year olds do you think there are in this town? It's called f*cking strategy, alright?
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  #2  
Old 03-03-2006, 10:24 AM
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And the sign said long haired people need not apply! So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why? He said you look like a fine upstanding....
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  #3  
Old 03-03-2006, 10:40 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Long Island
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZIGGYSTARDUST
And the sign said long haired people need not apply! So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why? He said you look like a fine upstanding....
well, I know at least one person gets it (lol).
__________________
Seth: Gimme that. Alright, you look like a future pedophile in this picture, number 1. Number 2: it doesn't even have a first name, it just says "McLovin"!
Evan: What? One name? ONE NAME!?!? Who are you? Seal?
Seth: Fogell, this ID says that you're 25 years old. Why wouldn't you just put 21, man?
Fogell: Seth, Seth, Seth. Listen up, ass-face: every day, hundreds of kids go into the liquor store with fake IDs, and every single one says they're 21. Pssh, how many 21 year olds do you think there are in this town? It's called f*cking strategy, alright?
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  #4  
Old 03-03-2006, 12:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZIGGYSTARDUST
And the sign said long haired people need not apply! So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why? He said you look like a fine upstanding....
....young man, I think you'll do. So I took off my hat and said, "Imagine that, me working for you!"
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  #5  
Old 03-03-2006, 01:57 PM
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Back when music actually was MUSIC! IMO! Only the old guys section for sure!
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